Unable to find any games shitty enough for a review in the cartridge department, the Nerd turns to a console he's yet to cover: The Turbographx 16. And no better way to introduce the black sheep of the 16-bit era than a game featuring that web-footed righter of wrongs, Darkwing Duck.

The Nerd talks about a game on the Sega Dreamcast, the final Sega home console, and while he doesn't have much beef with it, he gets to review a crappy Dreamcast game. Simply known as "Seaman," it's a game about the aquatic reproductive system (what can you expect from a game named after jizz), it's interactive, it's freaky, and the has the voice of Mr. Spock for some reason.

On Halloween night, the Nerd finds a flaming bag of shit on his doorstep. And in that bag is The Crow for Sega Saturn. Not based on the 1994 movie, but the inferior 1996 sequel, and plagued with horrifying graphics and ghastly game-play.

The Nerd is a big Mortal Kombat fanatic, and yet he never checked out a little N64 game called Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero. In light of the Christmas season and the subzero chill in the air, he decides to fire up his Nintendo 64 and see what he missed.