Alf tests the patience of good-natured Fred Johnson and his wife from next door by using their phone to make a very long-winded long distance call to Rita. After expounding upon funerals in the pub, Alf repays Fred by buying him so many drinks he falls over. Meanwhile, Alf's homeward progress pushing Else in her wheelchair ends in drunken calamity.

Alf returns from the funeral of Else, his long-suffering wife. Having lost her disability allowance of E30 and half the pension, life ahead is not too rosy.

When Rita and Winston come in at night making a noise, Camille decides to start locking the flats' door at 10:30. But can Alf make it back from the pub in time?

Camille's obsession with locking doors takes on new dimensions when she even locks Alf into his own flat but then he needs to go to toilet. Meanwhile, the shopkeeper wants to call in Elsa's debts, and the milkman has some news about her gambling.

Fed up with everybody having a Sunday roast except him, Alf makes his first trip to market. But he's forgotten he can't cook.

Alf's old neighbour Min turns up uninvited with her senile sister.

When Rita wins a winter sun holiday abroad, Alf complains about having to spend Christmas alone.

Alf's joy at Rita's pending divorce is short lived when he learns she is to live with the new doctor.

When Alf is given a cordless telephone, it turns out to be more of hindrance than help.

Alf has a fight at a tea dance and meets up again with his adversary outside his house.

Alf is spending Christmas in hospital for a hip replacement but his visitors' scare stories of what could go wrong propel him into fleeing from the ward dressed as a woman - which incurs a drunk's unwanted attention. Back at the house he is outraged when Mrs Hollingbery's sister turns up after his room,being told that he is not expected to live but all is forgiven when Mrs Hollingbery invites everybody upstairs for a Christmas party. Unfortunately he has forgotten the loose stair rod and ends up back in the hospital.

Alf has had his hip operation and Winston has moved out, replaced by his straight cousin Pele. However, some things never change, such as Alf's continuing feud with Camille, particularly as she hogs his TV.

Encouraged by Arthur, Alf continues to pursue Camille, even getting down on one knee to propose though she wants time to think. After a night at the pub, a surprise engagement party is thrown for the still undecided couple, but when Camille learns that, as husband and wife, they could buy the house for a fifth of its worth, she's quick to accept.

Alf and Camille are preparing for a trip to Australia to meet her rich brother, in the hope that he'll lend them money to buy their house cheap off the council once married. Alf, ever the romantic, persuades Arthur, as best man, to accompany them so he can have someone to talk to (Camille doesn't count). It could also have something to do with the fact that Alf is terrified of making the trip.

Facing another Christmas with a frugal dinner Alf cons the vicar into giving him a Christmas hamper but Mrs Hollingbery refuses to accept it because it has been dishonestly obtained. So Alf takes it to the pub to raffle,making sure that most of the slips of paper with the winning name on bear his. However he is outwitted at the last minute by the equally devious Bert Luscombe.

As a result of a power cut, Alf and Camille repair to the candlelit pub where Alf sounds off about Margaret Thatcher, despite her being a Conservative. This sets off an argument with Arthur and Mr. Johnson about a number of things – including death, the undertaker at the next table unsettling Alf.

They may be halfway up the aisle but Alf and his bride-to-be are still arguing, especially when she wants to throw out his furniture as being tat. A fake overdose attempt cuts no ice so Alf is off to the pub to talk about suicide, death and Heaven – though Fred Johnson, as an atheist, is having none of it.

Complaining that Alf is a shabby dresser, Camille also wants him to take out life insurance in case he goes first. At the pub, a discussion on health does anything but allay Mr. Carey's fears about getting a hip replacement in view of Alf's hospital horror stories.

Alf decides to earn some money by window cleaning for Mrs. Carey. Despite failing to get any wages, he gets lots of free groceries after catching the milkman in a compromising position.

Alf tries his hand with man's best friend, much to Fred Johnson's delight, but who's taking who for a walk?

Initially delighted when summoned for jury service, Alf becomes increasingly paranoid that he is being stalked.

As jury service draws closer, Alf is worried about the possibility of revenge from the criminal fraternity.

As Alf's wedding to Camille approaches, the preparations unfold: gift giving, Alf's stag night, and finally the big event itself.

A year after being left at the altar, Alf is still living – and bickering – with Camille, particularly over her leeching friend Michael. Alf's patience hits a new low when a car alarm outside the house goes off, so he decides to teach the driver a lesson.

Alf decides to become one of Mrs. Thatcher's entrepreneurs. He enlists Michael's support in a car parking scheme on match day and starts a paper round.

After holding forth on moral issues, Alf goes to the pub where the big news is that Mr. Johnson's wife has left him for her lesbian lover. To make matters worse, she intends to move her into the marital home. Alf, of course, blames the French for introducing permissiveness into the country and ends up threatened by Mrs. Johnson for his pains.

Now wealthy, Alf sees life in a new way. The bank manager is curious as to how Alf acquired his money. Alf enters a private hospital to spend his money before he dies.

Alf enjoys his newfound wealth and indulges in some of his hobbies: eating, drinking and looking after himself! In between, he tries to resist Min's amorous advances and foil the suspicious bank manager.