Receiving a pay cut after thirteen years at the quarry, Fred decides to quit and become a bus driver. With Barney as co-pilot, Fred delivers fifty kids to school, a nerve-shattering experience. Not wanting to let the job get the better of him, he dutifully picks them up again but mis-delivers them home.

When his neighbors' domestic fights suddenly end with the disappearance of the wife, Fred suspects Alvin Brickrock of foul play. After reading a detective magazine, he becomes convinced that Brickrock is really Albert Bonehart, wife-murderer.

Determined to rise above manual labor, Fred attends night class at Prinstone University and is drafted as a quarterback on the varsity team. But during the big game against Shale U., and exhausted Fred creates problems when he confuses his football signals with his accounting course figures.

Fred and Barney encounter the penniless J. Montague Gypsum, who is threatening to jump from a bridge. Fred takes the man home and learns too late how responsible he is for the life he saved.

Fred receives a ticket to a television game show that offers big prizes, but succumbs to stage fright before the show. Barney subs for him and wins a house boat, which Fred then tries to claim as his.

Fred is chosen by PeeWee League players (including Arnold and Mr. Slate's son) to umpire a playoff game. His troubles mount when he must call the game honestly despite the pressures from friends, employers, and big league baseball scouts, who are observing Fred in action.