Captain Cook and Mahnra, an Indigenous woman stuck inside the body of a goat, plan to steal The Endeavour from Darling Harbour.

Captain Cook and Mahnra steal the Endeavour and escape Sydney Harbour while being pursued by the police and some aqua bogans.

In a hide out, Cook and Mahnra drink their sorrows away before being visited by something pretty spirity.

Mahnra and Cook are thrust into the DKI. They are met by the all-knowing, all-seeing monolithic spirit head, who has big plans for Cook.

Cook, Mahnra and Elder Spirit infiltrate Australia Day. Cook gets naked, Shannon Noll is sacrificed and the Prime Minister throws a tantrum.