Fans wish you all the best and good luck!

For his first show, Jan ventured into the darkest corners of the internet, into the epicenter of serious Illuminati and clairvoyants – on Telegram. Follow him down the rabbit hole and finally learn the truth about the big "conspiracy."

Jan Böhmermann is in election fever. Still electrified by the exciting US election, he's immediately back to analyzing the CDU party chairmanship race.

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Jan Böhmermann answers the question why former Wirecard board member Jan Marsalek has balls of steel.

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Jan Böhmermann deals with right-wing extremist structures in the German police.

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The new HuFo at Berlin Castle is so fresh, hip, and above all, retro! It really has EVERYTHING in the new old Hohenzollern Palace: souvenir shop, museum café, quiet room, and maybe even stolen art from the colonial era?

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Jan Böhmermann describes how a deadly pandemic can sometimes be seen as an opportunity.

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Jan Böhmermann explores the question of where we should get our daily Trump madness from after the end of Trump's term in office and awards the "Orange Angel" seal of quality.

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Jan Böhmermann investigates the background behind the EU border protection agency "Frontex".

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Jan Böhmermann answers the question why so many influencers are drawn to Dubai.

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Jan Böhmermann investigates the question of who the 17 most spectacular German interior ministers in the world actually are.

Jan Böhmermann wonders why digitalization is progressing so slowly in Germany.

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Jan Böhmermann answers the question why millions of dollars continue to flow into professional football during the Corona crisis, while ordinary consumers have to fear for their existence.

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Jan Böhmermann examines the circumstances of the Corona cluster in Ischgl and delves into the shadowy world of the Austrian ski lobby.

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Jan Böhmermann deals with the long-term consequences of the use of nuclear energy.

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Storks fly south in winter, Thor Steinar jackets march from west to east year-round. There are good reasons why Nazis like to settle in the East.

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Sand doesn't just lie lifeless on the beach and stick to your water shoes six months after a Mallorca vacation: it's everywhere! In cars, houses, soap, computers, and grated cheese—making it arguably the most undervalued raw material of our time.

The dirty stepbrother of quality journalism is a pure money-printing machine of the last century. Doing business with lies and misanthropic stories under the guise of press freedom?

Even 16 years later, Hartz IV still does not work as the promised great labor market reform: two-thirds of the people who slip into unemployment today end up directly at the old social assistance level from before 2005.

Just a few days ago, the Oscars were awarded in L.A. And in Germany, the film industry is doing what it does best: always casting the same three men in leading roles, producing films with shallow storylines, and never a single film without a penis joke.

Austria, you are our favorite neighbor! You gave the world Wiener Schnitzel, DJ Ötzi, and, unfortunately, a young boy as Chancellor. That's why it's always good to have a true friend who, in difficult times, can honestly tell you that your dear little Penate Chancellor with the €600 gel hair is painting the four pillars of democracy turquoise.

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Over the past 18 months, we've been lazy, shady, dirty, and tired, and with the Lieferando app on speed dial, we've racked up a serious sadness pound. That's over now. Summer is starting, time to get your body back in shape.

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What's on Wikipedia is considered "the truth." If you don't like that, you can let reality be changed where it's made: in the world's most important encyclopedia.

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Germans love technological innovations. ACTUALLY. But in reality, we fear a hostile takeover by autonomous robots that will steal our jobs and take over the world.

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Germany, a country made for cars, not people! Because let's be honest: Cars are simply better people. Or have you ever had your heart broken by your city SUV? Probably not!

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Ever heard of microtargeting? Facebook makes a lot of money from it, and ALL parties represented in the Bundestag use microtargeting on Facebook in their election campaigns.

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We have good news and bad news: the AfD lost the federal election. BUT, thanks to a few million idiots, it can still enter the Bundestag for a second time and even win something.

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True crime is EVERYWHERE! Besides Helene Fischer's new album, there's nothing hotter right now than mysterious stories about real crimes! True crime experts on TV are especially mysterious.

Moria, the refugee camp on the Greek island of Lesbos, burned down a year ago! Afterward, everyone agreed: Something as inhumane as the Moria camp must not be allowed to exist again in Europe.

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Whether in mouth oil, bath bombs, dog shampoo, or lubricant – CBD is in everything, even though lifestyle CBD is to the body what the demands of Fridays For Future are to politics: It doesn't matter. Sorry to ruin the placebo effect for you again.

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On May 10, 1991, angry demonstrators threw eggs at Chancellor Helmut Kohl on the market square in Halle an der Saale, prompting Kohl to promptly launch a brawl with the protesting East Germans.

The ZDF MAGAZIN ROYALE presents a gripping musical about unity, the power of revolution, and the power of love, centering on this now almost forgotten turning point in the relationship between East and West Germany.

If your old schoolmate contacts you again after years, there are only two options: Either he finally wants his "Fast and Furious" DVD box set back, or he now works at Deutsche Vermögensberatung AG and wants to sell you 15 life insurance policies. What one in ten Germans, including your old schoolmate Sascha, does can't be wrong! Can it?

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Welcome to QUARTER TO WELKE – the talk show that's making headlines. Today, we're discussing sex, cabbage rolls, and the loss of power of the former media giant Axel Springer SE with five high-profile guests.

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Yesterday, knitting sweaters in the Bundestag, today climbing the career ladder. Compromises are necessary if you want to govern, and then the traffic light coalition will work. Or, dear Greens?

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The German constitutional state is merciless and consistent! Whether it's theft, robbery, manslaughter, murder, or driving without a ticket.

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Facebook is working with crazy fascists and burning down the democracies of the world.

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Why are we still in the middle of a fucking pandemic despite the vaccine? The research team at ZDF Magazin Royale has discovered: There's a world outside of Germany. AND who would have thought: When it comes to vaccinations, the world splits in half!

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Thanks to Freud, there has been an effective treatment for mental illness for over 100 years: psychotherapy! While it helps, in Germany it's easier to get a free PCR test than a psychotherapy appointment.

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Eternal life & world domination - who is Peter Thiel, the future boss of Austria's disgraced former Chancellor Sebastian Kurz?

When was the last time you thought about National Socialism? Over half of all Germans don't like to think about it and would prefer to put an end to the topic.

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What a week! There's another war in Europe. War in the 21st century! Should we update all our news apps around the clock and follow the Klitschkos' Instagram stories, or just put our smartphones away?

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Paying for things online? Never! Especially not for pornography, which is accessible 24/7. And the age restriction is even easier to bypass than the Sanifair turnstile. So, all good, right?

Honestly, our relationship with Deutsche Bahn is a case of couples therapy. They keep standing us up and making us wait, but in the end, we still find ourselves standing hopefully on one of their tracks. And they take our money, too.

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Music, dance, life, passion – nowhere are these powerful concepts more united than in pop music. And pop shows are always on TV! Brilliantly produced events with special effects, stars, and all of it packed into a compact 180 minutes.

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Right-wing populist rulers are all the rage! And the current show is about one of these right-wing poster boys: Viktor Orbán – formerly liberal, now right-wing nationalist.

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If you click through the timelines and hashtags, you'll quickly find yourself talking about cosmetic surgeries from fitness influencers. And these surgical procedures are advertised there just as casually as the latest running shoes from the human fountain of youth, Kai Pflaume.

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Clemens Tönnies has them all: the mini wiener chain, the grill torch, and the crispy ham – all the delicious meat products made from ground cartilage, hooves, and bacon that we love so much on the grill. What's going on behind the butchered pigs of the slaughterhouse empire?

We were all deceived by Vladimir Putin—and above all, DISAPPOINTED. But at least we're now on the right side in a war. All of Germany is against Putin. Except for a few who spread Putin's propaganda here, too.

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Fynn Kliemann has all sorts of things in his portfolio: DIY, NFTs, and so on. But what do you do when a global pandemic suddenly appears? How can you give something back to society?

"That's a lot of opinion for so little knowledge." This sentence is often heard in editorial conferences and got us thinking. Who's constantly calling the landline, and what does the Sunday question have to do with Germans' sex lives?

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We love vacations. Whether it's winter or summer break, we're basically always on some beach with cocktails and diving lessons included. We especially enjoy traveling with TUI. Let the ozone hole be the ozone hole for a while and chill out.

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Who is actually responsible for prosecuting hate speech online? Each of the 16 federal states is responsible for its own actions – what could possibly go wrong? The Internet police patrol car urgently needs to be inspected.

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Water – H2O, as we Quarks viewers call it. This super element is a true all-rounder, versatile, and something we take for granted in Germany. But: We have a water problem.

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Animals – man's best friends. That is, when they're not spreading deadly diseases. It's incredibly annoying! Zoonoses are infectious diseases that are transmitted between animals and humans.

Microtransactions? Sounds kind of boring. Things get interesting when little Johannes can't leave his bedroom for nine weeks and suddenly €15,000 is debited from his dad's account via PayPal.

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Will Star Wars soon become a reality? And what do satellites have to do with it?

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What do members of parliament actually do after their time in the Bundestag? Some have been hit hard. One wrong step, one careless moment, one casual signature, and they're in it: lobbying.

Who is responsible for cybersecurity in Germany? And what is the common thread doing here again? The trail leads... to the Kremlin!

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Wine drinkers have style, solid wood bookshelves, and can explain complex issues like the Middle East conflict or the dangers of cancel culture in just a few words. But they can only do all of this with a liquid companion in hand.

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How about a good mood for a change? And what helps better than music? Lots of music!

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Dear Federal Office for the Protection of the Constitution. Honestly, the 90s, 00s, and 10s weren't your era. Even today, things aren't always running smoothly, and you've shredded a few files on the NSU and right-wing extremism too many.

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Public broadcasting: Incorrect distribution of funds, poor working conditions and outdated structures in the committees.

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Sometimes dad's tirades aren't enough to catapult little Lucas into the Bundesliga. That's when professionals step in: player agents, managers for football talents so young that they occasionally lose a baby tooth while heading the ball.

A school without pressure to perform and stuffy classrooms. In harmony with nature, perhaps even with a petting zoo – Waldorf schools. A concept with extraordinary approaches and a questionable inventor with a penchant for racial theory and esotericism.

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The greatest threat to Germany is, OF COURSE, left-wing extremism and its most cunning advocate: the FDP.

There is agitation against trans people. Journalists, activists, academics, and even veteran feminists take to the streets to protest self-determination or write "opinion-driven" articles in "liberal" daily newspapers.

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Besides a factual debate about THOSE UP THERE with the family and dried-out wreaths with real candles, what's a must at Christmas? An Advent calendar. That's why we want to open a very special Advent calendar with you.

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Murder! Or manslaughter? A person has died at the Interior Ministers' Conference. It's unfortunate, because such a conference is always an event with snacks and champagne, but now this gruesome act overshadows the proceedings.

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Germany has a bunker shortage. Therefore, the hard-working, ultra-rich perpetrators of the crisis must take their fate into their own hands.

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Why not like someone for once? After all, there aren't only assholes in the world, are there? Well, in the human world... Orangutans have clean lives, shiny fur without split ends, and their mothers lovingly care for their children.

The first staff review meeting of 2023 is coming up, and Ms. Dings has come up with some great ideas to improve the working atmosphere in the future. But the only thing on Jan's mind is White Lotus. And unlike his colleagues Markus Lanz and Horst Lichter, he has mixed feelings about ZDF.

Christian Schmidt has been High Representative for Bosnia and Herzegovina since 2021 and is something of a problem bear. "High Representative" sounds like Superman's next nemesis, but it's an office with a lot of power and special powers.

Like the entire ARD pre-evening program, it's time for a quiz. In the popular "Who Said It" section, our writers are allowed (or required) to answer questions about memes, trends, and quotes. Everything from P for pop culture to L for Lanz. Knowledge of English is assumed. In some subject areas, massive gaps in knowledge emerge... Anyone who gets it wrong more than three times has to ride through Ehrenfeld on a blind donkey.

We're talking to you about the most contagious virus since the dawn of humanity: enthusiasm and success. Now some people might say, "Wait, those are two different things." Simple formula: You always have more than one of the good things in your pocket.

Naturally, the opinion of our valued audience is important to us. Were all their wishes fulfilled? What was there to discuss? After each ZDF Magazin Royale broadcast, the studio audience can give their feedback: How did they like it? Was it fantastic? Superb? Or just brilliant? Was the warm-up hot enough? Did Jan's suit have a sufficiently high viscose content? Are there really as many rats in the studio toilets as everyone says? We want to know everything. After all, television is primarily work for the viewers.

Five months later, we take a closer look at a topic that's still relevant today: the protests in Iran and the Iranian Revolutionary Guard. They use torture, terror, and violence to maintain the Ayatollah's rule.

Finally a stream again, I'm so grateful. I got banned from Twitch because these pissants keep reporting me, filthy. Be sure to keep up with my Instagram stories.

One thing is certain in life: death. For relatives, it's a real bummer, because Grandpa Alois also wants a proper burial. But what actually happens between the deathbed and the grave? It's a good thing Grandpa Alois doesn't have to experience that anymore.

Do you have a relative you're thinking, "Hey, he won't be around much longer?" That's where the personalized urns from the ZDF shop come in. Avoid awkward situations and discuss the urn motif before it's too late!

Jan has a big problem: He's still deeply stuck in his business coach mindset. And the feedback from the last few shows has been better. And Jan HATES feedback and performance reviews.

At Guinness World Records you will not only find absurdities such as the longest beard or the most cups in one hand, but also records set by governments whose basic democratic understanding is not really record-breaking.

He's the most powerful 10-year-old in children's programming: Ryder, the leader of the PAW Patrol. No one else owns so many vehicles at once and has six puppies under his control. Above all, Ryder is ruthless when it comes to marketing his overbred puppies. There's no product that isn't adorned with his dogs' faces. A case for child welfare!

Satire in its purest form. Dieter Nuhr has been a fixture in German cabaret for many years and is now hard to imagine without him. He dissects current political events with biting humor.

There's no reason to be ashamed of a bald head, just as there is no reason to be ashamed of a Harley under the carport or the gin collection in the in-house bar. Germany's most oppressed minority lives among us and holds (some) system-relevant jobs.

After our breakfast prayer, we were in the mood for a little guessing and riddle fun. The concept is as simple as it is ingenious: Jan and various ZDF Magazin Royale authors unravel quotes from the world of stars, starlets, and memes. In addition to voice cracks and witch burnings, this issue also features interviews with athletes. By the end, you're probably asking yourself, "What was the reason?"

German city centers: Always there for you, but never the way you'd like. A gray concrete jungle, the same old snack bars and optician shops. And if you're under 80, a woman, or poor, leisure activities become difficult.

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The path to your driver's license: theory lessons, theory test, practical lessons, practical test. Stress-free learning in a pleasant environment – ​​just like in a real school. Only the classroom, aka driving school car, is a bit more cramped and often more oppressive.

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Anyone can produce a show from tape. But going live is the pinnacle of linear television. So the team dressed up, cursed a lot beforehand, and simply let the tapes roll.

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We like to buy German brand-name products, and we're no exception when it comes to guns. But please don't confuse us with the gun nuts over there in the US. After all, they also choose German and Austrian quality workmanship for their guns.

British week(s) on ZDF Magazin Royale! Baron Steffen Glamour von Bickendorf joins the big names on "You" and "You."

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The International Center for Migration Policy Development (ICMPD) is an international organization that has adopted a motto: Good foreigners in, bad foreigners out!

We're crazy about the sea. And when you say sea, you also have to say container shipping. Behind all this are friendly family businesses that care more about the taste of salt on your tongue than about trivialities like fair wages.

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Twitter after the Musk takeover: Why do you suddenly have so many right-wing accounts recommended in your timeline? Why are some of the accounts you follow only displayed sparsely? How political is the purchase of the platform really?

Whether it's Southside, Rock am Ring, or Deichbrand – who makes these entertainment fireworks possible? Eventim, of course, our trusted ticket provider. Well, often you have no other choice.

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Unity and justice and hoarding gold. Gold is the all-rounder and therefore extremely popular – especially among Nazis, aristocrats, and Reich citizens. So gold manages to have an even more unpleasant core target group than Gönrgy.

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Today, the focus is on ritual violence. It's said to originate, for example, from satanic cults that use brutal rituals to control the personalities of their victims. However, there's no evidence for this. Or does a psychotherapist know better?

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Get out of Germany and get a taste of something new! If we want to improve our German, the following places remain: Austria, Switzerland, Mallorca, everything around Lake Garda, campsites in the Netherlands, and Liechtenstein.

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Somehow, Germany has lost its spirit. And what do you do with once-popular brands that no one wants to know about anymore? You give them a new coat of paint and label them with "with a new recipe." Let's get to work. Because #YouAreGermany.

Police officers send each other racist, anti-Semitic, and other degrading memes on WhatsApp. Things they find really funny. But how are these "satire" chats actually viewed by their own colleagues in the police force?

Are officers from Frankfurt's 1st Police Station involved in the "NSU 2.0" threatening letters? What role does a homemade wedding cake play? Satirical investigator Jan Böhmermann searches for the perpetrator(s).

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Out of the stuffy Bundestag offices and into adventure. Travel fever knows no political leanings! But oh dear: The budget is almost used up before the summer holidays! How do you get to the next crisis zone with an empty travel budget?

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Most Germans take their organs with them to the grave. Every eight hours, someone in Germany dies because they don't receive a life-saving donor organ. Is the organ shortage solely our fault, or is it (once again) those at the top?

A larger-than-life duel despite competitors the size of thumbnails – and the battle seems clear. The bee is great because it produces honey and pollinates flowers, the bark beetle is evil because it destroys trees. Is it really that simple?

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Delicious shakes, puddings, iced coffees, and much more. These delicacies can also help you lose weight—what's the catch? Despite reputable advertising faces like Carmen Geiss and Rezo, could these products possibly even have unwanted side effects?

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It's time for the ZDF Magazin music episode! THE music festival of the year with Alli Neumann, Apsilon, Oliver Tree, Domiziana, Ski Aggu, Badmómzjay, Blumengarten, and a special surprise act, now on your favorite MainStage: the ZDF Mediathek.

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When he heard that a rat had been seen in our canteen, Günter Wallraff immediately hopped on his bike and rode to the Ehrenfeld studio. Then, for the first time in many years, it was time for Jan to listen. As a longtime journalist, Wallraff has experienced numerous threats and lawsuits. The 81-year-old has won numerous awards for his investigative reporting and social commitment. A life dedicated to press freedom. In an interview with Jan, he spoke about his disputes with the Bild newspaper, the challenges of his career as an investigative journalist, and the most spectacular investigations of his career.

You can hear it on every corner of the internet: Cancel culture. But what does it mean? When you're not supposed to sing racist songs anymore? When you're not even allowed to light a cigarette in the office? Or when media lawyers want to suppress free reporting?

The penultimate meeting with Ms. Dings. A recap of the past few weeks. And, of course, there's one topic that can't be avoided: "Wetten dass...?" Jan looks back on the Gottschalk era with mixed feelings. In this rather balanced staff meeting, Jan also provides some clarification about his "real" fandom.

Same-sex marriage has been legal in this country for six years. However, the government still prefers the following scenario: the man earns more than the woman, the woman stays at home. And the government also offers generous incentives for this form of marriage.

It's gotten cold, so put on your wool socks. Find out why Jan easily beats kangaroos at Scrabble and why a fish named Bertram will soon be swimming in our office in our feedback box. Thank you in advance – your feedback is as good as a warm shower!

Networking is no longer done at wobbly bar tables at trade fairs, but digitally! Tincon, Maker Faire, OMR, re:publica, and the like – they're all united on LinkedIn.

The war in the Middle East has never been so clear and easy to understand. It's obvious: Who is to blame, who is anti-Semitic, who is racist, and who—and this is ultimately the most important thing—is right?

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It's a long-kept secret: Four animals were the authors of the German Basic Law. The ZDF Magazin Royale sheds new light on the true story behind its creation.

Affordable fueling, enjoying a quinoa bowl, and just being human. In reality, however, rest stops are expensive, the food tastes bad, refueling is costly, and you have to pay to take a boat. Why are German rest stops such a misery?

Having plants in the home has long been more than just a trend. It's part of the personality of urban trendsetters, an important status symbol in the background of video calls. But where do houseplants actually come from?

The FPÖ, the AfD's Austrian sister party, is leading in the polls. Will Austria soon have a new "People's Chancellor"? And why is someone like John Otti not in the German charts?

Maximilian Krah is one of the AfD's most extreme figures and knows exactly how to appeal to the voters of the future. In addition to a "traditional" image of masculinity, he also propagates misogyny, racism, and anti-democratic thinking.

Hunting is sport, hunting is tradition, and above all, hunting is pure nature. Around 436,000 people in Germany have a hunting license—can so many Germans be wrong? First of all: Yes. Because not everyone is concerned about preserving a healthy ecosystem.

Professional teeth cleaning and braces: Only the best for your teeth, and you're happy to pay extra out of pocket. But what do the legendary studies actually say about this?

Germany is in a deep sleep! Society and politics fall asleep when it comes to uncomfortable decisions. Enough of that! A judge will ensure law and order. In the name of the people.

The Bhakti Marga religious community is headquartered in the Taunus Mountains. Their guru's motto is "Just Love." But why does Bhakti Marga, alongside meditation, dancing, and yoga, generate millions in annual revenue?

The ZDF Magazin Royale is like a regular episode of "Die Rosenheim-Cops": There's a dead body. Who does the lifeless body belong to? Jan sets out to find clues, as there are clues as to who might be involved in this criminal case.

Thousands of German highway bridges are in need of repair. Our bridges are like boomers: They've been working their butts off for us for a long time, but now their bones are rotten, and the government hasn't taken care of their replacements in time.

"If you sleep with the window open, you'll wake up with a cold" – the truth is right there on the windowsill: drafts make you sick. Yet most people in Germany turn a blind eye to the obvious danger.

On February 19, 2020, a right-wing extremist murdered nine people of immigrant origin in Hanau, Hesse. The night of the attack raises many questions, especially about the work of the police. Added to this is the patchy investigation following the terrorist attack.

The hashtag #Astrology has billions of views on TikTok. Merchandise, personal advice, and questionable medical recommendations. Where does astrology end as a harmless hobby and where does it become a dangerous alternative to science and facts?

Johann Sebastian Bach, Klaus Kinski, Goleo. All great names who have one thing in common: They are geniuses. Some attentive readers may have noticed that the list includes only men. So where are the female geniuses?

Once fashionable, now stigmatized: smoking. Can disposable e-cigarettes bring us back to the good old days? Will flavors like "Mango Guava" and "Strawberry Iced Peach" reintroduce our youth to healthy snacking?

Artificial intelligence is so ubiquitous, it's time it did something for our security. For example, protecting the EU's external borders. How brilliant would it be to finally be able to outsource inhumane actions to machines?

Football is a passion, a fandom, a popular sport. But it's also an opportunity to earn a lot of money. There's plenty to be had not only with TV rights and merchandise, but also with sports betting. Tipico, Bwin, and Betano are some of the big players.

Behind the scenes with Jan Böhmermann and the ZDF Magazin Royale. What drives the people behind the show? A team of journalists got exclusive insights.

Sometimes all you need is a cup of tea, and you'll be fine! The tiredness gets better if you put your phone away! This is what people in Germany have to listen to when they seek medical help for long Covid or ME/CFS.

Dust can be created when feces and urine meet, dust can trigger allergies, be vacuumed, make movies magical, accelerate climate change, avenge colonial nuclear tests, and maybe even save humanity. Don't you believe it?

Instead of working outdoors, weather forecasters are slumbering in stuffy TV studios, waiting to ruin everyone's evening with one word: "Rain." They deserve to be able to host a show in the glistening snow once a year.

In some regions of eastern Germany, there are free advertising papers that resemble local newspapers. In them, Grandpa Kurt finds obituaries, reports on club events, and the occasional guest article by Hans-Georg Maaßen.

Gaming, Twitch, Steam – even in the world of computer games, there's a catch: people, especially men, in internet subcultures. How apolitical can a scene be where racism, sexism, and right-wing extremist communities are part of everyday life?

Already that late? Just a quick check of my DM inbox. Oh, Jan Hofer uploaded a Reel. This TikTok shows how to make your own chocolate. A YouTube tutorial on how to build a pool. Better look for apps to help you fall asleep.

In the heart of the beautiful Sachsenwald forest in Schleswig-Holstein, the promised land of the young CDU veteran Daniel Günther, one can often be puzzled while taking a break at a mysterious hut. Why are there so many mailboxes at the entrance?

Some of the former intelligence chiefs want to give it another try in retirement: out of the German intelligence services and into the well-paid private sector. Perhaps the knowledge from their former days will also prove useful in their new jobs.